Brute Jonny

I’ve come across some really awesome/easy recipes and I think more people would make food for themselves if they knew how easy it was. I’m gonna start off with one of the easiest things I know how to make. It only has 3 ingredients you can buy at any grocery store, and the outcome is more than the sum of its parts. OREO TRUFFLES!! Another great thing about this recipe is that you can easily vegan-ize it. Did you know that Oreo’s are vegan? My friend Sam taught me so. So if you want vegan truffles you would use vegan cream cheese (I think Tofutti makes a popular one. And though I really don’t like the taste of it, it should be okay mixed in with the rest), and dark chocolate for dipping. Now here’s how I do it:

Ingredients:

1. 15 Oreo cookies (regular, not Double Stuff)
2. 2.5oz of Cream Cheese, room temperature
3. Chocolate for coating. Chocolate chips work fine, but you want to use nice chocolate and something that will compliment the taste of the Oreo.

Tools:

1. Food processor -or- a plastic bag and rolling pin
2. Large mixing bowl
3. Heat-safe bowl, ideally one that will sit snugly on a pot of boiling water.
4. Baking spatula or large spoon
5. Wax Paper
6. Cookie sheet or cutting board

In order to keep myself from eating an entire bag of Oreos in truffle form in a day, I like to make these 1/3 package at a time. So that’s 1/3 package of Oreos (1 row of 15 cookies), about 2.5 ounces of cream cheese (the packaging should be marked), and I just add the dipping chocolate as I go. (This recipe can be done with a whole package and an 8oz package of cream cheese if you want to make more. You can scale it up or down as you wish.)

Okay, first set 2 cookies aside which we will crush later for garnishing. This is optional, it just makes it look pretty, and I think it makes a big difference. You can skip this step though.

Next place your remaining 13 cookies in your food processor and blend them until they turn to very fine, lightweight crumbs. Alternatively, you can place them in a large freezer bag (be sure it’s completely sealed) and beat the shit out of them with a rolling pin. The food processor works way better though.

Pour the crumbs into your mixing bowl. Now add your cream cheese. It’s best to have the cream cheese at room temperature, because it’s easier to mix.

Next mix everything until it’s a homogenous mixture. I usually start off with a spoon, but usually just end up using my hands to mix them. Be sure to wash your hands first, dirty bird. Now your mixture should be a mushy, dark brown lump that has a very greasy sheen.

Cover your cookie sheet or cutting board with wax or parchment paper. Now pinch off about a Tablespoon’s worth of your dough and roll it into a ball. You can make these any size you want. Keep in mind you will be dipping them, so the final truffle will be a little larger than the baaaaaaaalls you make now. Place each one on your wax paper.

Throw this whole thing in the fridge and let it get cold. If you don’t get these really cold, they will fall apart when you dip them in the melted chocolate. The freezer is fine too, but don’t leave them in too long.

While your ballz are in the frigde, bring a pot of hot water to a simmer in your pot. Place your heat safe dish on top. Glass or metal is fine. I think fancy cooks like Rachel Ray would call this a double broiler. Place your chocolate in the bowl. Be sure to put a decent amount in there because you want to be able to dip your ballzz without having to roll them around. Also be sure your bowl and utensils are dry as a bone, because if your chocolate gets the tiniest drop of water in it, it will be ruined (it destroys the crystal structure).

Really quick, crush the remaining 2 Oreos.

Do not step away from your d. broiler. Constantly stir your chocolate, encouraging it to melt. DO NOT over heat it or your chocolate will become untempered and it’s a huge pain in the ass to re-temper, so just don’t over heat. You want to try and keep your chocolate less than about 90 degrees if you can. Once about 2/3 of your chocolate has melted, remove it from the heat and stir vigorously to melt the rest of it. The cooler you can keep it, the better. Remove then stir, remove then stir, remove then stir, etc etc etc etc…

Now all you have to do is dip your chilled Oreo truffles in the chocolate and completely coat them, one at a time. Place each truffle back on the wax paper, then sprinkle just a liiiiitle bit of your reserved Oreo dust on top before the chocolate cools. Once you’re done coating all of your truffles, place them in the refrigerator and let them get really cool again. Your chocolate should have a pretty decent crack to it once it’s chilled. If it gets gross, your chocolate probably got too hot or needed to be tempered.

So that’s all you gotta do! You have about a dozen Oreo truffles! Now go impress your mom.